Aug 8, 2018

Update

I was at the hospital since 8 am, just got home.  Her gallbladder was taken with four incisions, a little complicated because of many adhesions, and like a bag of small gravel.  The anesthesia did her in again.  The type she received was safer for patients with heart conditions and is used (and must be) with a muscle relaxer.  She's miserable.  Surgery was at 9 and she is just now fully waking, making sense and able to comprehend.  This afternoon ran the gamut of intense pain, hallucinations, sudden sleep as if she passed out, confusion, and I thought several times she was gone or having a stroke.  The breathing issue is worse than ever and she is in a panic, fighting sleep because she is afraid she will stop breathing.  They have no answers for her on that terrifying condition.  I got a few spoons of ice cream into her and that's it.  Tomorrow will be a better day.  But she has to go through this sedation again. 
 
As I watched her it was as if I was sitting at my mom's death bed all over again.  I know one day her tears and cries to help her will be her last as she gasps for air.  It was a very hard day for both of us.  And hopefully tomorrow will be better.  Even though a surgery and medication was the cause today, it doesn't stop my mind from storing the images of these episodes, and fear of the future.  I am very grateful she made it through the surgery, but feel overwhelmed by sadness.  How foolish is that?
 
I need to step back for a few days. 
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
 
 
*******************

31 comments:

Margaret said...

Oh Marly. I'm so glad your sister made it through the surgery today. But this is so traumatic for everyone. Hang in there. Take a breather. You need to step back and stop thinking about it for a while. Hang in there. Prayers continue for you all.

Cactusneedle said...

I can't imagine how stressful this must be for you. I want to hug you and tell you everything will be ok but reality is uncertain. I pray tomorrow will be better for you both, and each day after.....

Terri Patillo said...

Marty: I am praying for you both. I wish you comfort and peace.

Maureen said...

Thank you Marly for sharing this update with us. Prayers continue for you all. Taking some time for yourself is wise. We'll be here when you're up to it.

rosek1870 said...

Praying...

capecodgirl565 said...

Prayers will continue flying your way!

Anonymous said...

Hang in there. You are one tough family and you're there for each other. Get some rest. Prayers as always.

Myra said...

Praying for peace ... His peace, that surpasses all understanding, for you and your family.

Edna D said...

Will be thinking of you during this difficult time.

Maryann Olsaver said...

Oh Marly, I feel so bad for you and Carole. Please know that I am keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers.

Anonymous said...

My heart aches for you and your family,your eloquence and strength bring tears to my eyes. Praying better days are ahead...hang in there Marly!

Ele said...

I am so sorry to read you are going through such a stressful and sad time. Hope your sister will soon feel better and you can relax a bit. Thinking of you both

Jacqueline said...

🙏🏻 for all of you.

Mugwump Woolies said...

Keeping you all in thought and prayer. Take care.
Robyn

Starry-eyed stitcher said...

This is such a difficult time for you and your sister. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Hopefully it will be worth it and your sister will feel better when it’s all done and you will be free from worry for a time. Very best wishes to you all. Irene xxx

Truus said...

A big hug to you Marly!
Can understand why you are thinking of your mum sitting next to Carole.
Praying for all of you and take care Marly.
Greetings,Truus from Holland

grand pam said...

Dear Marley, Praying for you and yours. I appreciate all the care and love you show your family.
“The Lord bless and keep you.”Numbers 6:24

Annmarie said...

You are all in my prayers. Your love and caring is such a gift you give to your sister and so very many other family members. Bless you for all you do for others. HUGS

Diane H said...

Thinking of and praying for you and yours. God Bless.

Robin in Virginia said...

Thinking of you this AM and hoping that Carole's breathing is better today. You and yours continue to be in my prayers.

Lee Morrison said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you & Carole. Hang in there and God bless...

Vickie said...

I am praying today is a good day. I am so glad things are going this well at least and this part is done.

kelley said...

((((hugs))))

debbie haggard said...

Not 'foolish' at all; but totally understandable at this very difficult time for you both; physically and emotionally. Memories of your mother inevitably make this experience more intense. Sending prayers, hugs, and continuing good thoughts for improvement.

Mary said...

Surgery done and successful, good news. I can not imagine how Carole feels but she made it through, goods thoughts for you both. Let her know we are all pulling for her, take care.

Heritage Hall said...

Now that the gall bladder is removed, let us hope her body will get the message and begin to heal...one negative out of the way. So sorry that sad memories emerge
as this time, but let us hope that with the completion of the procedures, Carole will snap back and start to enjoy better health and well being. You, my dear, are
a heroine in all of this and such an example of family loyalty. Take care to renew your strength and allow the hope that much better days are ahead for all of you.
Continued prayers and caring.

jan said...

Being the family caregiver is emotional and absolutely exhausting. You are doing right by your sister, supporting her, nursing her, carrying her fears and worries as your own. I am sending my warmest good thoughts to both of you, and to your hubby as well, because he is the one supporting you. ...jan

Rugs and Pugs said...

I hope today was a much better day, for both you and Carole.
Hugs :)

Mary A said...

Praying for you and your sister, Marley. I watched as my sister struggled through 3 liver transplants, pacemaker, and knee replacement among various minor surgeries. After a while you get what professionals call "crisis fatigue." You just can't maintain that level of alertness and energy. Stepping away is a very wise thing to do. Rest and recharge.

Vera said...

Prayers and thoughts for both you and Carole Marley. AS Jan said, being the family caregiver is exhausting - in so many ways...emotionally, physically, mentally. Sending you hugs.

BARBARA SHORES said...

So sorry for both of you and your families. You will be kept in prayers ... with hopes for better days ahead.
Peace and Blessings, Barb

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