Aug 11, 2018

Leftover Ativan

Hi folks.  Made it through the hardest parts with a few pills to spare.  I'm sure I will need them again.  Carole has been through many tests and they are stumped to find the cause of breathlessness.  We waited two days for the final CT results after they suspected lung disease, but they found none.  Whew!  Her lymphatic system has been compromised for many years because of destroyed channels, one leg from the ankle down, the other from below the knee.  Her legs are now huge, hard, and after massive Lasix doses, no change.  This fluid is probably throughout and may be what is causing the pressure.  Trying to talk is like having a blood pressure cuff inflated around her chest.  We have no lymphologist here, she will be getting manual manipulation to move the fluid from someone local though.  When is a good question.  Decades ago she was treated at Cleveland Clinic, but getting her back there now will not be easy, unless this exaggerated episode will not resolve.  Once the stones are out and antibiotics for the sepsis are done, the fluid will slowly dissipate.  Hopefully.  Her last surgery to remove the stones and stent will be end of this week.  It looks like the last month of summer will be over about the same time she recovers. 

Today is sausage Saturday.  Lots of Golden Daggers from the garden will be stuffed today and put in the freezer.  I cook the stuffing but not the peppers because freezing softens them.  From the freezer, cover with spaghetti sauce, into the oven.  My Italian sausage is always in large clumps making it hard to stuff so I threw the cooked meat into the processor and after a few pulses, perfect.  Ready for rice and eggs.

Now that I am finally settling down a little, I plan to check the linen drawer and start Barrick's sweet little design. 
The Stitching Girls are another option but this design has fewer color changes and I'm looking for something easy.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I think the Girls will be finished in a long rectangle for hanging, or maybe even smaller for a fob.  You know I am always changing something.
 
 
This evening after a hospital visit, Mark will take me for a ride in the county with an iced coffee. 
Hope your weekend will be a good one.
 
 
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Aug 8, 2018

Update

I was at the hospital since 8 am, just got home.  Her gallbladder was taken with four incisions, a little complicated because of many adhesions, and like a bag of small gravel.  The anesthesia did her in again.  The type she received was safer for patients with heart conditions and is used (and must be) with a muscle relaxer.  She's miserable.  Surgery was at 9 and she is just now fully waking, making sense and able to comprehend.  This afternoon ran the gamut of intense pain, hallucinations, sudden sleep as if she passed out, confusion, and I thought several times she was gone or having a stroke.  The breathing issue is worse than ever and she is in a panic, fighting sleep because she is afraid she will stop breathing.  They have no answers for her on that terrifying condition.  I got a few spoons of ice cream into her and that's it.  Tomorrow will be a better day.  But she has to go through this sedation again. 
 
As I watched her it was as if I was sitting at my mom's death bed all over again.  I know one day her tears and cries to help her will be her last as she gasps for air.  It was a very hard day for both of us.  And hopefully tomorrow will be better.  Even though a surgery and medication was the cause today, it doesn't stop my mind from storing the images of these episodes, and fear of the future.  I am very grateful she made it through the surgery, but feel overwhelmed by sadness.  How foolish is that?
 
I need to step back for a few days. 
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
 
 
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Aug 7, 2018

Monkey Mona

But the dish for Fancy Feast Filet Mignon is missing!  I need them all before I can make a decision or I will continue to scatter pieces across the tray.  I do not care if you're busy.
 
 
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Aug 6, 2018

Change of plans of course

Greetings folks.  I got my Barrick charts today.  Wow.  So nice to have full size quality paper and print.  I plan to start one tonight.  If I can get the chocolate off my fingers. 
 
First off I want to thank everyone once again for support and concern and helpful suggestions.  There are several reasons we are staying here in this Steward facility, the first being Carole will not go out of town.  She has one son that works shifts and also volunteers (fireman).  He is lucky to catch a few hours sleep without interruption.  She has one sister (who is brilliant... well..  used to be) and one brother (obsessive personality is putting it mildly) and one brother in law.  To be alone a few hours away is very scary to her and with her health condition, does not want to be in a position that her son or we could not get to her if an emergency situation arose.  We are all only 15 minutes away here and that is comforting to her.  And us.  Dr. Sachdeva and Dr. Vallabh are very fine surgeons with excellent reputations that have treated family previously.  We are very lucky to have them both.  Her family doctor has been a Godsend to her and other family members for almost 40 years and treats us like his own family.  The mix ups and errors and rudeness are not as important as the people actually saving your life.  I found out that there is a nationwide shortage of Ativan!  It's not just the hospital, no one around here has any.  So I took her some of mine which they allowed.  The gallbladder removal is Wednesday, nothing tomorrow, because that surgeon is on vacation as we thought, but were told otherwise for days.  The process will be backward, gallbladder first, stones the next week, but that is what it must be.  Good.  She will have a week between anesthesias.  Hopefully the organ will not burst or disintegrate upon removal and that will go smoothly, and she will be monitored and dosed to wake from the surgery.  After the PCP, cardiologist, gastro, and pulmonary people said they are at a loss to understand the shortness of breath, I did my own research.  It seems a diseased/inflamed/enlarged gallbladder and complicated by blocked ducts can cause gastritis, which bloats the abdomen, puts pressure on the diaphragm, and can cause this.  It's the best I got!   Forums with other patients have shown this is common and many have claimed to develop breathing issues, not realizing it could be the gallbladder (or other abdominal issues).  She is hoping this is her case and the scary breathlessness will cease.  Dr. Vallabh said people Carole's age rarely have pain indicating there is a problem (she has NONE), but a younger person would.   Her antibiotics for the sepsis have created a real problem "digestively" and also a yeast infection in her mouth and throat.  But her fever is down and they are pleased.  So there you have it!   Wednesday is the surgery and we are praying all will go well and her heart can handle it.  I will update then, maybe even have a little stitching to show.
 
Thanks everyone.  Bless you all!
 
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Meeting of the minds

Monday.  Finally.  Two of the surgeons will get together and resolve the confusion of which surgery will be first and by whom.  The second will be the following day and none of us agree with this.  A high risk surgical patient should not be put under two days in a row.  One doctor said the gallbladder removal is not urgent, the other disagrees.  I want to know why she is so short of breath after the first bout with anesthesia.  Did the risk of weakening the heart already start?  We have no answers from anyone. Tuesday is the first surgery.  I have enough Ativan for a few days!  I may take a few of mine to the hospital and talk to the nurse.  They were ordered for Carole to help with the anxiety but of course, the hospital doesn't have any.  There is a large Rite Aid across the street and a Walgreens on the corner.  When my brother worked at the hospital he was always running to one of them to purchase medications.  Now, new owners, new rules.  So since they can't supply her I will ask if she can have one tomorrow since she is terribly upset.  What surprised me was when I kiddingly asked if we could bring our own drugs, the answer was yes.  They are scanned from the Rx bottle, taken to the hospital's pharmacy and dispensed as ordered.  The patient takes their meds back home when they leave.  I don't know if I mentioned that they also do not have Nexium which she needs at night so we took her bottle from home and she is now getting them. 
 
I came across more corner squares waiting to be attached and it was hard to throw them out. 
I also changed the Hannah Haines sampler bag to a stuffed small.  It did not sell as the pouch so maybe this will be more appealing.  Trying to keep busy and get things ready for a sale.
 
I will post surgery results Tuesday at some point, and hope all the prayers and wishes will be answered.
 
Thank you all.
 
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Aug 4, 2018

A few good things

I recently came across a few items that I'm happy to have found.  The first is the free color card of Farrow and Ball paint.  No where to purchase locally and quite pricey, but I've always wanted to see their colors.
You can also order up to five wallpaper samples, which I hear is coming back into favor.  The color book fandeck of larger samples, all colors, is $35. 
 
The second goody is from Joanna Gaines Magnolia line of paints.  Her website offers a sample sheet of your chosen color for $2, that easily sticks and peels to all surfaces allowing you to check color on every wall at every light angle.  I love them.
I do love the Shiplap shown here, kind of gray, kind of blah, not pure white.  A whitewash look that is light but not bright.
 
And my sister asked me to look for that sticky green stuff. ??  Of course she assumed I knew, I did not.  She said you knead it and then use a tiny piece on the bottom corners of framed items so they don't shift.  Any item really.  I know there are clear dots of adhesive in the paper craft section of the store, but I did find these.  She claims they have never marked her walls, and I can't say if they or those dots would.  But they work to keep displayed items straight.
 
 
Speaking of her, I went to the hospital this afternoon and straightened a few things out.  After nicely asking for her nurse, and why the leg sleeves were not hooked up to the pump, and why her antibiotics doses were 4 hours late, and why the woman in the next bed is taking over 3/4 of the room, and why there is no chair for her to sit, and why there is no room for the tray table, and why Carole was not given a walker, I decided that waiting over a half hour for this nurse was long enough.  We were there for six hours and still invisible. So I took my notebook and pen, walked to the hallway, and promptly wrote down the phone number of the nurse administrator from the large wall poster, making myself visible to all.  Before I was finished, someone tapped me on the shoulder and introduced herself.  A little out of breath so I'm assuming she came flying down that hall.  I totally understand that some patients need extra attention.  But a new patient should not be dumped in a room as she was for hours without her meds or a walker.  I got what she needed, I got her a new room, I got the medication list corrected, and as I was leaving the IV meds were being hooked to the pole, a full five hours late.  Will I comment to the administrator?  Yes, that our nurse was very busy, meds were late, but when she had the time she fulfilled the patient's needs.  How's that?
 
Carole's friend came to visit and we were talking about how she (Carole) always had cheese in the fridge and it was her favorite indulgence especially at night.  I made the comment that there is a good chance those stones are actually cheese balls.  First time she laughed in a while.  Then I came home and collapsed, ate half of a pizza, and decided to stay home all day on Sunday. 
 
Hope your weekend is a good one!
 
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