Coping, day 17

 I walked without assistance this morning.  Ten feet, but that's ten more than four days ago.  Yes I sounded like a race horse that lost but we can't all be winners.

UPMC calls for updates and commented that many patients have my symptoms, others entirely different, and there is no particular product or remedy that works/treats a virus.  Four bottles and over $100 later from a health store verified this.  So does this mean that what may help me won't help others?  Yes.  But not always.  It's possible.  Not probable. A shot in the dark.  But if you're already in darkness does it matter?

Just in case, I thought I would list some items that I feel helped me cope with the head, dizziness, nausea, fatique, insomnia, shakiness.

A tray table was filled and moved from room to bedside making access easier and keeping aids together.  The stomach issue was helped with small portions of banana in morning and throughout the day, and applesauce.  Mylanta helped calm the stomach jitters and strawberry Pedialyte was also taken in small portions.  Less drowsy Dramamine was quartered, enough to help without causing sleep.  Vernor's ginger ale a few sips at a time between all else was another small comfort.

An hour before bed, one Tagamet, right before bed, 10ml of Mylanta, and the wedge pillow made a huge difference in my morning upset.  The breath tester is used every hour as recommended.   I was using the Tussin at first but it worsens the Sjogrens dryness so I stopped.  Tylenol or Advil along with 12 hour Delsym is preferred.

Mark asked if I wanted my bright green bag on a neck chain but after changing to this routine, I did not need it again in mornings.  But it has become an accessory for doc visits and car rides.

I am anxious to shower but certainly cannot chance a problem between the heat and steam when this weak.  So I am using the bathing cloths and No Rinse while seated, and Mark purchased a few Shampoo Caps (new to me and a Godsend).  I had a fever for over five days but was too sick to care about being stinky.

I have not seen Carole and the long ride would certainly require the green bag and then the long wheelchair ride to her room would contribute to the motion illness.  She is in tremendous pain and they doubled the Oxy, but she is doing therapy. 

My head is spinning, I have not been online and it feels as if I've missed years, but reading or browsing does not keep the stomach calm.  Need to grab my banana and a sip of Vernors.

So just in case someone is going through similar symptoms, and not yet found some tiny bit of relief, I'm hoping what helps me may do the same for someone else.

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This afternoon

 My husband will put me in the transport chair to a doctor.  I can't even stand long enough to wipe my face or brush my teeth.  Several hospital trips, two EMT home visits, inability to stand, walk, or speak loudly enough.  It will take a very long time to recover, but the main issue is the change to my heart and trying to regain a safe rhythm.  Thank God for my devoted and caregiving husband.

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Update

 My sister made it through the surgery without issue, both surgeons were pleased.  She is doing well.

I am not.  I think the monoclonals were a little too late.

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That's a wrap

 Four of them in fact.  My heavy sweat clothes over cotton thermal, with two fleece and one sherpa throw on top.  How can you be so fricking cold when you have a fever?  So jittery and unnerved, this is weird.  We did not receive a call yet for a treatment appointment.  Getting nervous but not as much as Mark.  He doesn't want to leave me if I don't improve and he needs to be there for her surgery.  She is terrified and been told over and over how risky it is with her heart.  I will have to pretend as best I can that I am better.

This is the bronze mum opening, I expected to step into the sun reflecting off concrete and feel comforting warmth, did not happen.

Back to bed, trying to stay awake more than eight of the twenty four hours.

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A positive attitude

 is a good thing to have.  But a positive test is not.  I was very surprised that they called at 8:30pm, slightly more than 24 hours since my test.  They told me at the hospital results would not be available until Tuesday.  Two negatives with the swab in the car, this one absolute positive and wanted to call me right away.  I had a miserable night, high fever for the second time.  I had a fever days ago, next day felt fine without symptoms, nothing noted at the ER visit, and then the fever again.  The covid icu nurse told me this virus is so unpredictable, but she found that when it finds a host it likes, it will present and then retreat to gain strength.  And then it will knock you on your ass up to two weeks later.  But not always.  I asked her if it likes crabass bitches as hosts, she said that's like family to it.

So what does this mean?   Mark has to be with Carole for the surgery, I can't even stay quarantined at the hotel because Chris will be in the suite with us and I can't  contaminate him or have him take this to the hospital.  Dammit.  Dammit dammit dammit!

I am so tired of white.

I have a feeling I will be buying more unwanted linen tomorrow and charts I will never stitch.

Would love this one but not charted by anyone as far as I could tell, Sarah Shepherd 1851.  Is it?  I need to shift my distraction and focus on something enjoyable.  I know stress makes it all worse.  Well, hell!!  Haven't had any of that in the last nine months!  But I will get through this.

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Isolate

 from what?  Contradiction, misinformation, disagreement, conflicting data, lack of data, theories, conjecture, hypothesis, assumption, speculation.  I just spent the afternoon in the ER recommended by Mark's doctor, did not want to go knowing it would be another afternoon of wasted hours.  Four of them.  For nothing. I just started coughing yesterday, what did they expect to see on an x-ray?  My vaxed cousin got vitamin D, vitamin A, antibiotic, prescription cough medicine, I got nothing.  Was told SO many contradictory and confusing facts that I came to the conclusion there are no facts regarding covid.  After the x-ray I told the doctor that I have GGOs in one lung and he said "well then you've had covid".  Pulmonologist said not definitive.  I informed him that my blood test for antibodies was negative so I could not have had it, he said that test is useless.  WHY GIVE IT???? The nurse told me that the in-car tests are not accurate and inserted the swab much deeper, said you must have symptoms in order to test.  Mark had no symptoms at the time and did the in-car swab, positive. According to her, impossible. They even differ between doctors and hospitals as to monoclonal treatments, testing, quarantine length, everything.  This nurse has been treating covid patients since the beginning, claims that day 15 - 18 are the absolute worse, she knows what I have is covid regardless of the test because of exposure, has a different time frame on monoclonals. told me to be very careful.  With what????  Stay home until you can't breathe and then it's OK to come in and we'll reserve a ventilator for you.  I understand that no one really knows the facts, Fauci who once was a wealth of information seems more concerned in how he looks on TV, and changes his mind daily, many times opposite of the CDC.  No one is to blame for this, but stop giving random guidelines or opinions between hospitals.  I'm done.  Not mentioning it again, nor the mess in the photo below.  I said I wouldn't again, but this one is just so insane.  What the hell is with all the green in almost all my choices?

 So ticked off.  I have pieces from all the dyers and PTP and Seraphim seem to be fairly consistent.  But I will never order Fiber on a Whim again.  Same count, same fabric, they seem to the most disappointing.  I'm sorry.  If your supplier is different, test it!  Adjust it.  Red tones green to brown, green tones pink to brown, violet tones yellow to tan, it's not rocket science.  And it's cost me quite a bit.  I am so grateful for Hobby House not only for service, but their policies.  They are dying their own now and that may be the last I try.  You know I am going to ruin these non-colorfast linens trying to get rid of the green don't you?  Especially the buttermilk and this one.  I will cut a small piece and see what the result is, probably as disastrous as before.  What the hell.  When I get this disgusted with everything, caution and reason are out the window.  Laptop to soon follow,

Last warm day here.  Enjoy yours.  Taking a few days off.

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That rock and the hard place.

 That's where I am.  Quickly, a mild headache turned ugly.  Choking, coughing, pounding head, low grade fever last night, chills.  But I once again tested "not detected" so I can't receive the treatment.  My new doctor never got back to me, Mark's doctor who has been handling this so far, hasn't yet today.  That result is not to be used as the "sole basis" for determining diagnosis and exposure is to be considered along with symptoms.  We are hoping this leeway allows the treatment. 

The 600 count print pillowcases I ordered are a mess.  Came out of the dryer like a rag, not for a facility.  It's not easy to find a single top sheet in a print, always sold in sets, but I'll keep looking.  I could make sets of cases from a nice percale.  Can't go into JoAnn and prefer not to sew them.  So I got out the Rit, and I made a few vintage cases pink and plan on pale yellow for two more.  When the head stops pounding.

Wish me luck with answers, it's been several hours and we have not received a call yet.

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Happy mail

 Partially.  This is only my second BBD book since I prefer reproduction samplers and ...... santas.  And I am thrilled with it, several projects I would like to stitch in addition to the repros included.  And Jean Donaldson will be a hoot.  Lots of interest in this sampler and the large print chart is appreciated.  

But once again, I received linen the end of September that I really like so ordered more of the same, and squirrel balls, it ain't the same.  I really don't like to return but since it can't be dipped, I apologized profusely. 

The only shop within an hour from me does not and will not order or carry hand dyed fabrics because she's been burned with inconsistent colors.  

And in case you're wondering, this is a squirrel ball.  He is burying the nut balls in my barrels, pots, gravel, and leaving some out as a calling card, right under the nose of snoozing Petey.  He also left one at the back door.  Silly squirrel.

I don't have results yet, hopefully soon since my window for antibodies is closing.  Headache is back today along with coughing hard enough to be glad I used that coupon for extra panty liners.  Although fine yesterday and assumed the scare was over, I am feeling worse as this day progresses.

Wonderfully warm day.  Ruined a batch of almond bars, didn't go any further.  I was not coughing when I planned her birthday treats and can't proceed now.  When the surgery is over and she is back here in therapy, family is cleared to visit, we will have treats then.  

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One hour and 50 minutes

is how long we waited outside to get another Covid test.  Since my initial test was negative, I needed to test after symptoms began in order to qualify for the antibodies treatment which Mark received today.  Originally, and still listed in the paperwork, unvaxed directly exposed qualified.  But supplies are now limited and restrictions are stricter.  So I had to test again and if negative, no treatment, if positive I will have a day left since treatment must be given within seven days of symptoms.  One hour and fifty minute wait for testing! So what did I do to reward my patience?  Wendy's chocolate frosty and an order of hot fries to dip.  Salty hot meets cold chocolate, heaven.

Before the covid diagnosis we stopped in Kraynak's to see this years offerings, and they had a fake feather style with reasonably stiff branches.  The top branch is shorter than it should be IMHO.  Price wasn't bad and it comes in two sizes.  Not a lot of photos this time but if you'd like to see more of this Christmas land store, click on this post from 2017..... Kraynak's

I hope they have a few of these large bells left when I'm out of quarantine.  I think they were $16 each.  The post from 2017 shows a nice assortment of wire tree styles but there were none on display this year.  Yet.  But they may not be getting any, who knows.

She is quite rattled that I may not be cleared to enter the hospital for her surgery.  Bad enough her birthday will be lonely.  I was going to make our traditional chocolate chip chiffon cake but that would require flatware and plates.  Cupcakes!  Pistachio, chocolate, pineapple if we can get what I need curbside.  I need to check with her facility about drop off permission.  Quite a few staff members have become friends and she can share with them, they will be happy to take her gifts up to her.  We'll wear gloves and masks and hopefully the scent of Lysol will fade by the time everything gets to her room.

The grabber I bought for outdoor stick pickup to save bending is great.  My arthritic hand tires easily with the trigger models and I ordered this in 36" length, might be a little long but I don't need to bend even slightly so this should be better.  Maybe not for short folk but it comes in various lengths from other vendors. The mechanism certainly is much easier for repetitive grabbing.  Love it.

Grabber Buddy

Have a good one!

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Seriously. $7

Waiting for the white minis to fade so I can move the monster mum and sweet potato vines.  Good weather all week, no frost, so I may have to move them to the back.  The vines were yanked out of the barrels weeks ago and surprisingly, are dense with new growth after being limp and scrawny from the yank.  I really like this plant against the fall mums so I'm glad both plants have revived.

Also glad that back when we had flea markets, I purchased aluminum pots for a few bucks.  The bail handles and pot will never rust but the handle mounts do.  After drilling drainage holes, perfect planters.  My galvanized buckets and pots are all rusting and will stain concrete and deck.  I glued plastic chair glides to the rusty bottoms so they are elevated.

This is the bronze color, my smaller orange and yellow are on the back deck.  Anxious for these to open, I don't think I had this color before. 

Carole's birthday is Friday and I wanted a party for her in the facility's celebration room.  It's off that very long gorgeous windowed hall and across from the expansive outdoor area, but we can't even visit now.  I had already purchased a pale pink luxurious throw and Amazon offered floral pillow cases of pink roses, so we will leave gifts in the foyer after disinfecting.  

Mark's doctor is handling our care since I don't have a doctor at this time, and we will know this afternoon about the monoclonal treatment.  As of last night, my symptoms started.

Have a good one folks.

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The inevitable

My husband's doctor called this morning on his way to church and asked Mark how he was feeling, that he would call him from the office with a plan Monday.  Plan for what?  Dr. said .... the lab did not call to tell you that you have Covid?  NO.  He has allergies that flare when blowing leaves or cutting grass, even with medication, and that's what he assumed his cold like symptoms were from.  But worse today.  My cousin can't stop coughing even with meds and is getting the monoclonals today.  Both vaxed for several months thank goodness, but of course, I am not.

If you are vaxed and exposed to Covid, quarantine is 10 days.  If you are not vaxed and exposed to covid, quarantine is 14 days.  Carole's surgery is in 12 days.  We tested Thursday, I was negative (Mark did not get results) but not exposed to it as long as Mark was so his doctor recommended I test again next week, symptoms or not.  Because of the upcoming surgery and being out of town, I don't know what will happen when I test again.  I honestly can't see how it would not be spread to me, in the car, sharing meals, sleeping together.  So I expect it.  Mark took his temperature several times a day since he was exposed last weekend and even through yesterday, never came close to a fever.  That is the test given everywhere before entering, we assumed it was the definitive guideline.  Nope.

I will be selling a 12" Riley Blake still sealed wooden clapper.  I bought two sizes, do not need this long one.  When I look at pricing and shipping, I'll post if anyone is interested.

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And now it's three steps

back after two steps forward.  Becoming more like a polka.  Roll out that barrel baby!

 You would think this is the photo from days ago after I had removed the border because of being two stitches off.  And you would be wrong.  What?  That numbskull wouldn't have removed it the second time, it was aligned exactly as the chart.  Again, wrong.  I have so many faults they could be alphabetized, this one is in the S's.  Symmetry disorder.  I didn't want to say symmetry obsession because it's not always an issue.  Just when things aren't the same on each side.  Yep.  That's only a disorder, no?  

When I removed the basting and unrolled the left side, a second look made me realize that Miss Rachel was not blessed with a symmetry disorder.  Her left side is two stitches closer to that damn alpha border which made my original error symmetrical!  To end this dance, I scanned the left side into Paint, flipped/reversed it, and I am using the layout of the left for the right.  Basically the same, and now it's position will be also.  Once I clean up the fuzz left behind, I'll give it another go 'round.

It feels like Sunday evening but isn't.  Maybe too many sweets.  I made the banana cake with coffee frosting that Carol forced me to with her description and photo.  I am embarrassed to admit, I consumed 80% myself.  I do need to make an attempt to drop 10 pounds.  

If you're interested in the harvest soup recipe, go to my recipe blog and you'll find it along with Upstate Minestrone (cabbage and sausage favorite) and although I am a bean denier, French Market is also wonderful.  Our local meat shop smokes the best ham hocks and that actually makes the beans tolerable.

https://marlanco.blogspot.com/

Hmmm.  Now that I looked up the recipes and saw the Orange Julius I want one.

Have a nice Sunday, already the second in Awktober.  Damn skippy.

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Wow.

 I thought about it, and thought about it, and thought about it, and realized I was wasting a great deal of repair time trying to avoid it.  Big girl panties on, carefully reversing some and Lift 'n Snipping the rest.  This was a major improvement over my impatient hissy fits of months ago.  Well, weeks.  Maybe a few days. OK, yesterday.  And then, and THEN, I started stitching it again with correct placement.  Am I sure?  I was the first time and look how that ended.  So this time, I started with the stitch closest to that alpha border and worked out from there.  I hope to get the flowers back in tonight.  But I do believe this newfound tolerance is temporary because my laptop is still at high risk of a window toss.

We won't be getting our Covid results until Monday, still fine, and my cousin received a call to report to a hospital in Erie PA for monoclonal antibodies this weekend.  He would have received treatment today but it's a several hour drive and he couldn't get there in time.  I received this information about treatments, some for early stage and one is even for patients already on ventilators.  Some doctors are willing to offer, others may not.  If I may be at risk of a vent or dying, I would not hesitate.  I think everything and anything you put into your body has the possibility to adversely affect some and not others.  So here's a few, not all, that have shown to be life saving drugs against Covid.

My husband had to cancel the 36 hole last tournament of the year even though his group encouraged him.  Outdoor event, certainly distanced, but he did not feel it was right.  So I instructed him to make dad's harvest soup which I will partake in shortly.

Have a good evening.

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Well ..... crapola

 Getting tired of two steps back for every step forward.  I really paid attention to placement and alignment yet the page three border needs removed.  One error, the vertical stem, is so obvious I can't believe it wasn't noticed.  That of course threw the continuing stem and branches off one, but my start at the top was also misplaced which makes two.  The flowers will be touching the alpha border on the right side of the sampler and not on the left, very noticeable.  For counting over and over and over, this is very disheartening.  I feel like putting Rachel aside for now and choosing something easy.

And then ... my cousin is sick. Mark and he drove together for a four day golf vacation, roomed together, ate the same snacks, golfed together, played poker, visited a packed restaurant.  The entire group is vaxed.  But Monday, Mike became ill and got tested.  We learned this morning he is Covid positive.  So husband and I wasted the entire day, just got back home, trying to find a testing site that wasn't backed up for hours, would answer their fricking phone so we could register.  Neither of us have symptoms.  Can you tell if that swab is in one inch?  Why isn't there a bump or stripe on the stem of the swab to indicate that length?   Hold the spot and when our finger hits the nose, bingo!  You're in deep baby!  Mike asked about treatments since he is really sick, but was told even though there are many very effective (from infusions to pills taken at home) none are being made in anywhere near the quantity needed to save lives.  Why?  

We won't have results until Monday.  Keeping fingers crossed!

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Something tells me ....

 this hard to detail sampler will be a joy.  On Hogbristle (but you know I never comply), undaunting in its small size, peacocks, crowns, flowers, a row of wacky fun letters, an unusual basketweave at the bottom, no over one that I can see.

 Hit that Add to Cart button!

Jean Donaldson 1826 from Cross Stitch Antiques.

Bingo.

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Fading to darkness

  Losing the warmth and sounds of summer days is hard enough, but losing light is even harder to accept.  

This is 7:08.

In the blink of an eye and a few sips of iced coffee, 7:21.  

It happens so quickly.  

Today was warm and after a full day of errands and tasks, I enjoyed my swing  for almost an hour until the darkness and chill appeared and I went inside.

Once inside, made hotel reservations for her surgery and after seeing another price increase from 2 weeks ago, I got ticked and bought more stitching items.

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Good looking men

 that work hard, take pride in their work, go over and above to satisfy the client, respectful, take only lunch breaks, and never once pull out a phone, are greatly appreciated.  And even the owner comes out and contributes manual labor in record time.  Outstanding, and costing no more than others.  They just finished an out of town job at a college with retaining walls, new lawn, new shrubs, walk areas, laid stone steps.  One employee was here a few years ago to fix the mess that Jason left and Mark was grilling garden peppers, he offered him a grilled sandwich of Italian bread with peppers, garlic. and Velvetta (sorry, that is the BEST cheese for pepper sandwiches).  I did not remember of course since last week is already forgotten, but he mentioned that and said how much he enjoyed it and appreciated it.  

So here's my hydroseeded side yard where the sewer pipe was run to the street by an idiot.  Neighbors have a four to five foot wide area of dirt from a two foot bucket.  This guy brought in massive unnecessary equipment and destroyed ten times that.  No photos of the 100 feet of seed along the road where the pipe was installed by township workers (more great employees) and filled, leveled, seeded by the pepper guy.

This is off the gravel fill where the concrete patio once was.  Not sure what will be done there but it's walkable without twisting an ankle now.

So we have three weeks to surgery and I'm wondering if Rachel can be completed in that time.  But I am not Saltbox Stitcher or Brenda, no matter how I try.  I am already picking a few smalls to choose for the waiting room, something larger can be worked on at the hotel.  

I hear 'ya about the Medicare options.  I am the only one in our groups that has a supplement, not an advantage plan.  My cousin (advantage) was flown by helicopter to another hospital for emergency heart surgery, did not pay a penny.  They also get several hundred a year towards dental, and free eye exams and glasses.  I pay close to $200 a month, my drugs are very expensive with the mandatory plan D, no dental, no eye, nothing else.  Hard decision but you are correct, you cannot go back once you leave.   So switching to advantage and setting aside what I would be paying for other .... $2400 a year + $300 dental + $250 eye, almost $3000 a year to use for co-pays and testing, is something to think about.  Roll over every year and I cold have a tidy sum for uncovered bills, and if not used, pay off the damn sewer project!

Have a nice Sunday, first one in fricking October. 

 You know it's chilly when Petey sleeps in his house.

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Eureka!

 Fox and Rabbit 36 count approximate 18x27 Eureka linen.  This is darker than a cream, more of buttercream but leaning to 738/739 with an apricot undertone.  This piece is not mottled.  I paid $28.99  Selling for $28 includes shipping to US.  If outside of US, you pay postage.  Check or Paypal.

If interested, please email samplersandsantas@gmail.com

Since I moved up to using a single floss thread on higher counts, I had to create a stash of colors and larger pieces for the big girls.  I appreciate the 8x12 size that 123Stitch offers.  Perfect for smaller projects, checking color, and testing my ability to stitch higher counts without spending a lot.  There are a few others I would like to add but I'm done for now.  Finding a perfect color and getting something different in a second order has happened in almost all.  Names are deceiving also because if I had green in my cappuccino, caramel macchiato and especially my buttermilk, they would be down the drain.  I don't dare attempt to alter the undertone because except for PTP, an edge test with water or spittle from my iron left a spot.

Today I'm making an attempt to rid the clutter in all rooms, not extra decor but crap everywhere from not cleaning for so long.  But not until Advil kicks in.  My arthritis is raging in back, hips, and hands.  This fiasco of my decades long PCP's policy of patient removal if they see another doctor has really hurt me this last year.  I need to find one that I can trust, several issues need testing.  Will try to do this before year's end because I will need to drop my supplement and move to an advantage plan.  My Plan D which was not a help with drugs is rising $42 a month.  When are seniors with limited incomes going to get some help?  Oh, I get it.  They figure we won't be here much longer, but younger people will be voting for years to come.

Have a good weekend.  Let me know if you are interested in the linen. Thanks!

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I was trying to help

but I'm not reliable.

 

Just in case you are considering a linen order based on my comparisons, don't.  On the right is the first order of 40 count Antique Lace, LOVE, and the second order is on the left.  Nuh-uh.  The other colors in the order are fabulous (Prairie Grass and Tobias).  Tobias is similar in depth to Ale but more golden.  But what a second order would be only the dye gods know.  Now I have 36 and 40 count linen to use, nice to have an inventory (even a small one) to check against thread colors when looking at a new project.  

I had to order HATS Rosa Sugars after seeing Brenda's finish, which does not make sense.  I do not enjoy stitching borders and avoid at all costs, I don't like bright colors, and did not need another project.  There 'ya go.  I looked at the history and the model was stitched on 56 count.  Stitches would be the size of over one on 28?  But with twice the linen threads which to me, would make it much more difficult.  

Rachel's trees do look OK if not magnified.  I used the needle point to pry open the tightly pulled linen threads, move floss to the corners to make a true X, steamed and pressed while stretching slightly.  The result is not the best, but getting there was very tedious.

Finally received a response to messages, surgery is scheduled for Oct 22, with both surgeons on the same day.  We talked about the contradictions and confusion, some of which she was unaware.  We cannot request the anesthesiologist but being the first case of the day, we have a shot.

The township installed the culvert pipe and finished yesterday, today the landscapers are planning to repair the yard, cover and seed, including the newly installed 15" pipe. 

Have a good one.

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